I used to smoke pot over that feeling, the overwhelming stress of life. It was a never ending story that my mind spun over and over, how I needed to smoke to cope. And that state was one of complete defeat.
To avoid feeling overwhelmed, I wake up everyday before dawn and do my yoga practice that includes breath-work. But still, I can get buried under the sea of my own emotions if I am not watchful.
A few hours ago, my dog almost got attacked by a big dog. Luckily I yelled really loud and scared the dog away. When I got home, I took a cold shower to calm down and sat with the buzzing discomfort of anger fueled with the adrenaline from the fearful encounter.
Meanwhile, I made sure not to fill my mind with a hopeless story of why this happened or if this is going to happen again?
Those stories are fuel to the fire of overwhelm, that blaze and burn me with despair beneath the inevitable irritation.
They feed a sense of worry that says that the situation is so bad, it is impossible to deal with. It’s a bleak story colored by a lusterless lack of hope.
That ignorant vision lead me many times into a deep rabbit hole, and the only way I knew how to escape was by smoking away.
I read in the Bible that when there is no wood the fire goes out. (Pr 26:20) So if there are no thoughts, the emotion passes.
I’ve experienced that surfing big waves. Times I’ve been buried by a mass of water and feel like I am going to drown, my instinct is to relax.
When the situation is truly one of life or death, my higher self takes over and I know that to save my life my best shot is to surrender.
So the good news is…
If I can do it in the water
Then I can do it on land
And If I can do it
So can everyone!